Chocolate & PMS

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a person has to do is open their mouth and they take their very life into their own hands!

This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's
license in the wallet of every significant other!!

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: What did I do wrong?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some more chocolate.

Some Things PMS Stands For:
Pass My Shotgun
Psychotic Mood Shift

People Make me Sick
Provide Me with Sweets
Pardon My Sobbing

Pitiful Mood Syndrome
Plainly Men Suck
Pack My Stuff......

. ..And my favorite one...
Potential Murder Suspect

And remember: Money talks...but chocolate sings.

My friend's husband, not happy with her
mood swings, bought her a mood ring the other day so he would be able
to monitor her moods. When she's in a good mood, it turns green. When
she's in a bad mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead. Maybe
next time he'll buy her diamonds.

Here have some chocolate.

This is my first time responding. I usually don't respond when I have to go to the trouble of registering, but I feel so strongly about the power of chocolate, that I went ahead and registered. First, I had to promise to not be threatening or VULGAR! There were a bunch of other conditions. I had to agree to not be a jerk. Well crap! (Is crap okay?)

Anyway, so then I register and all that. THEN I forget my password. This is a total pain in the butt (Is butt okay?), just to say that I'm a firm believer in chocolate. Well, not firm -- part of the side effect of too much chocolate.

So, I'm registered and can now comment here. If I can remember my password! Rolling Eyes

Lucky, freakin' YOU! (Is freakin' okay? Cause you know I don't mean freakin'.)

I like the little smileys!

Oh, and after all that, I think you owe me some CHOCOLATE! Evil or Very Mad