Movie review: "Sunshine"
by SouthernFriedInfidel | Published on February 16th, 2008, 10:09 am | Arts
I didn't bother to see this film while it made its rather short run in local theaters. After all, I had gotten wind of the general plot (intrepid band of scientists on a mission to jump-start the Sun) and expected that I would have a hard time suspending my disbelief. A couple of folks chastised me for being a "science snob," and pointed out that the film generally had pretty good reviews-- mostly on account of the special effects. So when it showed up available to rent through iTunes, I figured what the heck? Can't hurt too much.Boy, was I wrong! This gawd-awful mess got green-lighted by a retarded gerbil... That is the ONLY explanation I can come up with.
I won't bother to critique the "science" in the film. There was none. The plot hung around scientists and engineers, living on a ship with a hyper-intelligent, smart-ass computer that is inexplicably unable to help calculate simple course changes. So one guy figures up a change in direction, forgets to cross a "t" or something, and dooms the ship to certain destruction.
The film is so full of idiotic, decades old cliches that it's sort of remarkable they had time to put in their special effects. In the end, the crew (which predictably thins itself down to practically nothing through a long series of extremely stupid blunders that could have been easily avoided by a pack of Cub Scouts) encounters the insane captain of the first Sun-restart mission, which appears to have been manned by a group that was even less intelligent than the current crop of dimwits.
The insane captain of the first ship claims to have been communing with God during the gap between missions. And apparently learning how to become a smear of light, rather than a proper man. Yeah, it was THAT bad.
My advice: don't bother to watch this load of crap, even if it is offered to you for free. There are some science fiction movies out there that are actually GOOD. This thing deserves nothing but ridicule and the company of all the other "visually stunning" stinkburgers of history, such as "Silent Running" and "Dune."
